I’ve written before about my liking for Castle and Season 4 is currently running on Alibi. As part of the large number of people who refuse to give a penny more to Rupert Murdoch than I have to, I’ve been watching Season 2 on Five (Fridays, 10pm). Except Five is run by Richard Desmond, who is the kind of idiot who will stop at nothing to make a quick buck. (Just for info, he also owns the Daily Star, The Express, OK! and… a whole bunch of porn magazines. Five isn’t is only TV channel, either, as he owns Television X, Red Hot TV and other porn channels.)
To draw a crude difference, Murdoch loves power, Desmond loves money.
Most of the adverts on Five are for other Desmond causes, the afore-mentioned Star or Express or the Health Lottery, his competitor to the National Lottery which gives to good causes like its Camelot equivalent, but in much lesser quantities.
Castle is broadcast from 10pm to 11pm and a full episode without adverts is about 43 minutes long. Except that 17 minutes of ads isnt enough – they actually chop the ending scene from each episode of Castle in order to run one of those “answer this easy trivia question for a chance to win £10,000” competition. Not delay the scene, actually cut it out altogether. This was most noticeable last night at the end of episode 2×05 “When The Bough Breaks”. The subplot of the episode was that Castle had completed the Nikki Heat novel, it was launched and he to look for a new project. He had received a lucrative offer to write for a “certain British secret agent” and seeing as no-one had any idea whether the Nikki Heat book would be a success, he needed the work. Throughout the episode, the amiable duo had been at crossed purposes and intentions, he conflicted about getting his dream writing gig, but realising he didn’t want it because he liked Beckett, her thinking she is finally rid of the cocky pain in the backside hanging around her job but realising she actually likes him. It all builds up to the episode ending where they are about to part company, culminating the plot not just for the preceding 40 odd minutes, but the preceding 20 episodes.
An ending which was totally removed by Five. A pivotal scene in the entire series just hacked out. And not particularly subtly either – as the opening “Thankyou” was broadcast and then the scissors came down with all the delicacy of a brick to the nads.
17 minutes available for advertising, and they still had to remove another two and a half minutes for a pisspoor trivia “competition”.
Why is every branch of the media industry seemingly run by clueless fuckwits?
I wouldn’t mind, but I’m really busy right now, I’m really tired and Castle is one of the few moments in the week when I get some time to stop and enjoy something light and fluffy. Bastards.